“…that
you may be mutually disposed, having mutual love, joined in soul, being
disposed to one thing--nothing according with faction, nor yet according with
vainglory -- but with humility, deeming one another superior to one's self, not
each noting that which is his own, but each that of others also. For let this disposition be in you, which is
in Christ Jesus also, Who, being inherently in the form of God, deems it not
pillaging to be equal with God, nevertheless empties Himself, taking the form
of a slave, coming to be in the likeness of humanity, and, being found in
fashion as a human, He humbles Himself, becoming obedient unto death, even the
death of the cross.” (Philippians 2:2-8)
We
are encouraged to be disposed to one another with love, unselfishness, and humility. Reading that exhortation is much easier than
applying it. The more years that I live
life, the more I realize how many things we do and give more for our own sakes
than that of others. It is in our
imperfect human nature to take care of and please our own selves first and
others later...
I
have even discovered that when I selflessly do or give for others, often times I
am still hoping for their appreciation or gratefulness in return. I am longing to receive something back from
them. When I receive back ungratefulness
and disdain, I become so upset (and sometimes angry) and end up asking myself
why I bothered doing or giving at all.
That reveals to me that I am still looking for something I do not need
to be looking for.
I
sacrificially give and do because I love deeply and love to help and take care
of others. I do not give because I sincerely
expect to be served back or highly applauded for my sacrifices. But I cannot tell a lie and say that it does
not hurt deeply to be faced with an attitude of disdain or a total lack of
gratefulness over and over again. It is
heartbreaking for me to give so much and to feel like those sacrifices are repeatedly
unappreciated or stomped upon. Some days,
I even tell myself to “Stop!” “Stop
giving so much of yourself and doing so much for those who do not even appreciate
the sacrifice it has meant for you.” And
yet, I cannot stop. It is not in me to
be that way. The love in my heart supersedes
the hurt in my heart.
These
days, as I often ponder all of these things, I see and understand more clearly
the boundless depths of the love of God.
This is the love of God. He
receives some gratitude from His creation, but more often than not, there is no
gratitude at all. He receives back a
great abundance of complaint, ungratefulness, and disdain for what He gives or
does not give and for what He does or does not do which does not sit well with
our selfish desires. Regardless of the
response He receives from us, He continues to love and give and do what He
knows is best for us. He does not scrap
His perfect plan that has been in fulfillment before any one of us existed on
this earth. He may long for us to return
His love and for us to express our appreciation or thanksgiving, but whether we
express it or not, He will not step out of His character of boundless,
unconditional love that gives His all and does what He knows is best.
Over
the past year or two, I have begun having the awful and painful feelings that
my sacrifices and all my giving are worthless when they are not welcomed or
appreciated. What can they possibly matter
when the ones receiving the benefits have no comprehension of the depths of
love and care with which I have given of myself to them?
Last
week, as I shared my heartaches with God, He encouraged me with the following
truth: The value of selfless giving and doing for others cannot be determined
by their gratefulness or ungratefulness.
The act of pouring ourselves out for others reveals who we are in Christ
and the work of Christ taking place through us.
Therefore, regardless of how these acts are received, they are of
immeasurable value and worth. They make
a difference even when you see no difference at all.
And
so, I am doing my best to daily hang on to the truth that pouring ourselves out
for the benefit of others is NEVER worthless.
The act may totally ignored, it may not be appreciated or understood,
and might even be cursed or spit upon, but it is never worthless. As I write these words, I see a picture in my
mind of Jesus Christ carrying His cross and willingly laying upon it to die for
the grateful and the ungrateful. I see
God faithfully fulfilling His plan and NEVER giving up on it or on us
regardless of all the mistakes we make. I
see the unfailing and unceasing love of God in Christ that pours over the whole
world. And I see that it is His moving and working in me that
sacrificially gives and does for others, and it is my body of human flesh and of
self-preservation which resists such selfless sacrifice.
“…He is operating
in you to will as well as to work for the sake of His delight.”
(Philippians 2:13)
“…for His
achievement are we, being created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God
makes ready beforehand, that we should be walking in them.”
(Ephesians 2:10)
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