His Beautiful Redemption

Life seems to be running away with me. I long for peace and acceptance of where God has me, but at the same time, I do not want to be content in areas where I should not be. I can't decide if I'm looking for a contentment that is unhealthy or if God is trying to teach me a lesson in contentment.

I am not looking for contentment in being spiritually stagnant or character growth. I am looking for a peace and acceptance of things in my life that I am not be able to control whatsoever. There are things I long to do and accomplish, and yet, there are other responsibilities in my life which daily take precedence over those desires. Daily life runs off with me and I can't seem to be able to spend time in other things I long for. There are circumstances that I wish I could change for the better. But what do I know about what’s better and what’s best? God is the (only) one that knows. I don’t know (and doubt) that if I changed things according as to how I think they should be, it would actually be an improvement. My thinking is finite, and I am certain that in the midst of difficult circumstances God is doing a mighty work in our lives. A work that cannot come about if I were able or allowed to change things according to the way I think they should be.

What is the Lord teaching me? What am I supposed to be learning? I feel like I am getting a lesson in FUTILITY. The futility of man planning this or that when only if the LORD wills can we do this or that. The futility lesson reminds me how I am not in control of things. It is God alone who is in control of ALL things, and He is surely showing me that each day.

“The steps of a man are established by the LORD…” (Psalm 37:23)

“The mind of a man plans his ways, but the LORD directs his steps” (Proverbs 16:9)

“Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit." Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. Instead, you ought to say, "If the Lord wills, we will live and also do this or that."” (James 4:13-15)

In the midst of all the struggle He reassures me that I am His beautiful redemption.

We are all HIS beautiful redemption....

I've had my forty days and forty nights at sea
I've had forty years in the wilderness, or so to speak
I've walked with sand from the ocean floor on my feet
To turn and say you left me

I'm a doubting Thomas needing to believe
I'm a perfumed sinner just like Magdalene
I'm Judas kissing on your cheek eager to deceive
I am all of these

Chorus:

I cry, Father, Father, forgive me
You say, Child, I already have
You are beautiful
Beautiful Redemption
You are Beautiful
Beautiful Redemption

I'm the guilty thief that's hanging by your side
And my shame is dying with your sacrifice
And all my fears come crashing down

As I look in your eyes I see paradise

Chorus

Hallelujah (we all, we all, we all fall down)
Hallelujah (we all, we all, we all fall down)
Hallelujah (we all, we all, we all fall down)
Hallelujah (we all, we all, we all fall down)

You are beautiful
Beautiful Redemption
You are Beautiful
Beautiful Redemption